1 00:00:05,396 --> 00:00:07,790 ♪ 2 00:00:31,466 --> 00:00:33,468 ♪ 3 00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:52,704 [entry bells chime] 4 00:00:52,748 --> 00:00:54,924 Mmm... 5 00:00:54,967 --> 00:00:57,013 So, what do you think of our new neighborhood? 6 00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,407 -Downtown River Creek. Ah. -[sirens wailing in distance] 7 00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:01,931 Got to say, sucks on a big one, Dad. 8 00:01:01,974 --> 00:01:03,324 This side of town is poor. 9 00:01:03,367 --> 00:01:05,630 My mood is poor because we're poor. 10 00:01:05,674 --> 00:01:07,110 Come on! 11 00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:10,113 Any moment now, I'm gonna come up with a kick-ass idea 12 00:01:10,157 --> 00:01:12,594 that will make us moderately rich again. 13 00:01:12,637 --> 00:01:15,466 So, in the meantime, let's just roll with it. 14 00:01:15,510 --> 00:01:17,729 Yeah, you just got to know where to step. 15 00:01:17,773 --> 00:01:19,862 Like... not there. 16 00:01:20,776 --> 00:01:22,169 -Coffee shop. -Bar. 17 00:01:22,212 --> 00:01:24,475 -Nail shop. -Coffee shop. 18 00:01:24,519 --> 00:01:25,694 -Bar. -Nail shop. 19 00:01:25,737 --> 00:01:27,217 Thrift shop. Huh? 20 00:01:27,261 --> 00:01:29,480 Oh, zippers on sweatpants. 21 00:01:29,524 --> 00:01:30,612 Huh. 22 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:36,096 FREDDIE: Kids, come into the kitchen! 23 00:01:38,881 --> 00:01:40,883 [sizzling] 24 00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,408 Cool! Fried catfish. 25 00:01:44,452 --> 00:01:46,454 So, what's coming up this weekend? 26 00:01:46,497 --> 00:01:47,585 Chinese New Year. 27 00:01:47,629 --> 00:01:49,152 Like, really new. 28 00:01:49,196 --> 00:01:50,675 Like, an all-new animal, 29 00:01:50,719 --> 00:01:53,809 not just new to the calendar but new to the world. 30 00:01:53,852 --> 00:01:56,072 No, it's your mom's birthday. 31 00:01:57,334 --> 00:01:59,684 Come on, you guys need to have your own ideas for presents. 32 00:01:59,728 --> 00:02:01,556 So what are they? 33 00:02:01,599 --> 00:02:04,167 Eh, physical gifts are stupid. 34 00:02:04,211 --> 00:02:06,038 It's not like she has a thing she collects, 35 00:02:06,082 --> 00:02:07,344 like you have neti pots. 36 00:02:07,388 --> 00:02:09,868 Okay, listen, I actually hate neti pots, okay? 37 00:02:09,912 --> 00:02:12,044 People get me one for every special day. 38 00:02:12,088 --> 00:02:14,438 Look, Father's Day, Father's Day. 39 00:02:14,482 --> 00:02:16,440 27th through 33rd birthdays. Oh, 40 00:02:16,484 --> 00:02:18,312 here's Christmas, Christmas, etcetera, etcetera. 41 00:02:18,355 --> 00:02:20,705 Look, I don't want your mom to feel how these make me feel. 42 00:02:20,749 --> 00:02:22,403 Okay? So put on your thinking caps. 43 00:02:22,446 --> 00:02:24,056 So, what are you gonna get her? 44 00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:25,580 Oh, well, I'm glad you asked. 45 00:02:25,623 --> 00:02:27,234 See, I'm-I'm very attuned to people. 46 00:02:27,277 --> 00:02:30,585 I notice things. I sense what people really want. 47 00:02:30,628 --> 00:02:33,457 Not to be a dick or anything, but I got to say, 48 00:02:33,501 --> 00:02:35,590 you're not a good a dad as you think. 49 00:02:35,633 --> 00:02:38,549 What? That's absurd. Right, Ollie? 50 00:02:38,593 --> 00:02:40,247 I don't know, man. 51 00:02:40,290 --> 00:02:42,423 You care so much what people think of you 52 00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:45,382 that you ruin what they think with your caring. 53 00:02:45,426 --> 00:02:46,905 [chuckles]: Oh, my God. 54 00:02:46,949 --> 00:02:48,298 You guys are so wrong. 55 00:02:48,342 --> 00:02:50,387 I am the best gift giver. Hello. 56 00:02:50,431 --> 00:02:51,910 And I'll prove it. 57 00:02:51,954 --> 00:02:53,695 I'm getting her... 58 00:02:53,738 --> 00:02:55,392 those sweatpants. 59 00:02:55,436 --> 00:02:56,785 Which sweaty pants? 60 00:02:56,828 --> 00:02:58,830 People look bad in sweatpants, okay? 61 00:02:58,874 --> 00:03:00,267 It means they gave up on life. 62 00:03:00,310 --> 00:03:01,311 Oh, no. 63 00:03:01,355 --> 00:03:03,357 A woman looks best when relaxed. 64 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:06,186 So I'll get her the sweatpants and you two will come up 65 00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:08,579 with separate, nice presents. 66 00:03:08,623 --> 00:03:11,930 And save half the catfish for your mom's lunch. Thank you. 67 00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:16,370 [applause on TV] 68 00:03:16,413 --> 00:03:19,199 Hey, Deb, you finish that floor model yet? 69 00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:21,810 [grunts] Working on it, Daddie. 70 00:03:21,853 --> 00:03:23,464 Just a few more tweaks, 71 00:03:23,507 --> 00:03:26,858 and this floor model assembly robot will do it for us. 72 00:03:26,902 --> 00:03:29,339 I didn't ask for a robot to assemble it, hon. 73 00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:31,254 I asked you to. 74 00:03:31,298 --> 00:03:33,343 Dad! 75 00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:36,825 You are wasting my engineering genius here. 76 00:03:36,868 --> 00:03:40,089 [groaning]: I could be coming up with kick-ass ideas 77 00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:43,440 to change the world and make us all moderately rich and shit! 78 00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:45,529 Oh, hell. 79 00:03:45,573 --> 00:03:49,490 Here comes the only thing me and Freddie can agree on-- 80 00:03:49,533 --> 00:03:53,102 your bad news best friend, Tonya. 81 00:03:53,145 --> 00:03:54,190 Cool. 82 00:03:56,192 --> 00:03:57,715 Wow. 83 00:03:57,759 --> 00:03:59,978 The place hasn't changed since we were kids. 84 00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:02,807 Debbie, how about a lunch place with drinks? 85 00:04:02,851 --> 00:04:04,548 Say, a bar? 86 00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:07,159 Uh, yes drinks, no to the bar. 87 00:04:07,203 --> 00:04:08,987 Let's keep it more casual. Keep it tenna. 88 00:04:09,031 --> 00:04:10,162 What's tenna? 89 00:04:10,206 --> 00:04:11,381 Like the shoe. 90 00:04:11,425 --> 00:04:13,601 Nobody says "tennis shoes." 91 00:04:13,644 --> 00:04:16,386 She's been trying to get "tenna" going for a while. 92 00:04:16,430 --> 00:04:19,346 Whatever. Deb, I heard of a place right here, downtown, 93 00:04:19,389 --> 00:04:24,089 with double, uh, deep-fried, uh, taco, uh, hot dogs. 94 00:04:24,133 --> 00:04:26,178 Debbie is in! 95 00:04:27,832 --> 00:04:30,313 Debbie is not in! 96 00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:31,880 Aw. 97 00:04:31,923 --> 00:04:34,317 All this dumb trucks are blocking my parking 98 00:04:34,361 --> 00:04:35,753 and stealing my business. 99 00:04:35,797 --> 00:04:37,189 Do something, horse cop. 100 00:04:37,233 --> 00:04:39,235 Ma'am, I'm on my lunch break. 101 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:41,716 So if you can hold that complaint for ten minutes, 102 00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:43,326 I can eat my food. 103 00:04:43,370 --> 00:04:45,285 TONYA: Ugh. 104 00:04:45,328 --> 00:04:46,764 Sorry about this, babe. 105 00:04:46,808 --> 00:04:48,766 Let's just... [groans] let's just do this. 106 00:04:48,810 --> 00:04:50,768 TONYA: Tick, tock. 107 00:04:50,812 --> 00:04:53,205 -DEBBIE: [groans] Come on! -TONYA: Tick, tock. Tick... 108 00:04:53,249 --> 00:04:55,512 This here is the pickup line, gals. 109 00:04:55,556 --> 00:04:57,297 Oh, shit. Okay, this one, this one. 110 00:04:57,340 --> 00:04:59,342 [Debbie groans] 111 00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:03,520 -Move, move, move, move, move. -[groans] 112 00:05:03,564 --> 00:05:05,174 Finally. All right, all right, all right. Here we go. 113 00:05:05,217 --> 00:05:06,610 Um, I'll have the... 114 00:05:06,654 --> 00:05:08,656 FYI, we're out of our signature dish 115 00:05:08,699 --> 00:05:10,092 that we should know everyone wants: 116 00:05:10,135 --> 00:05:11,441 the double deep-fried taco hot dogs. 117 00:05:11,485 --> 00:05:14,270 -We're out of that. Go! -Okay, uh... 118 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:16,881 Just put ten dollars of bacon on a bun, okay? 119 00:05:16,925 --> 00:05:19,014 And then throw in some cheese in a burger patty. 120 00:05:19,057 --> 00:05:20,145 And four beers. 121 00:05:20,189 --> 00:05:22,887 No alcohol in food truck land. Go! 122 00:05:22,931 --> 00:05:24,454 -Oh! Oh. -Oh, gosh. Oh, God. Oh, god. 123 00:05:24,498 --> 00:05:26,021 -Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. -[Tonya groans] 124 00:05:26,064 --> 00:05:29,372 The irritation and, like, impossibility are 125 00:05:29,416 --> 00:05:31,853 what makes it so fun. 126 00:05:31,896 --> 00:05:33,376 [chuckles] So street. 127 00:05:33,420 --> 00:05:34,682 Ugh. 128 00:05:34,725 --> 00:05:36,727 Street food culture is a great way 129 00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:38,729 to get back in touch with our places. 130 00:05:38,773 --> 00:05:41,558 I really like seeing people learning to eat again, 131 00:05:41,602 --> 00:05:43,299 city style. 132 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:47,303 A carne asada taco is a great way to connect with... 133 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:50,219 Shut the fuck up. 134 00:05:50,262 --> 00:05:51,960 What the F is wrong with you? 135 00:05:52,003 --> 00:05:54,441 Why can't you just relax and enjoy this super cool, 136 00:05:54,484 --> 00:05:57,182 fun experience, this perk of living on the north side? 137 00:05:57,226 --> 00:05:58,488 Just be cool. 138 00:05:58,532 --> 00:06:02,405 Don't activate me, Jame. 139 00:06:02,449 --> 00:06:04,538 I'm covered in food in the hot sun-- 140 00:06:04,581 --> 00:06:06,278 no awnings in sight-- 141 00:06:06,322 --> 00:06:08,411 sitting in a parking lot with a bush in my back 142 00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:09,891 and a homeless man stealing my napkin 143 00:06:09,934 --> 00:06:12,110 so he can wipe his ass. 144 00:06:12,154 --> 00:06:13,416 No, it's fine. Go ahead. 145 00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:16,419 And you want to know the worst part? 146 00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:18,813 -No drinks. -No drinks! 147 00:06:19,770 --> 00:06:21,642 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 148 00:06:21,685 --> 00:06:24,340 Tonya, I see... 149 00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:27,517 a demand that ain't being supplied. 150 00:06:27,561 --> 00:06:29,432 [chuckles] 151 00:06:33,958 --> 00:06:35,395 [entry bells chime] 152 00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:38,049 Uh, yeah, excuse me. 153 00:06:38,093 --> 00:06:39,921 Yesterday, there were some sweatpants in the window. 154 00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:42,576 Uh, tenna pants. You know, casual attire. 155 00:06:42,619 --> 00:06:45,492 Another woman just purchased them, right there. 156 00:06:45,535 --> 00:06:47,450 ♪ 157 00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:49,844 Oh, come on, honey. I'm-I'm late for work. 158 00:06:49,887 --> 00:06:51,019 [entry bells chime] 159 00:06:51,062 --> 00:06:52,760 -E-Excuse me, lady. -Yes? 160 00:06:52,803 --> 00:06:54,675 Look, I-I must get those pants off you. 161 00:06:54,718 --> 00:06:57,678 No! I-I'm sorry. Uh, from you. [chuckles] 162 00:06:57,721 --> 00:06:59,462 Oh, these tenna pants? 163 00:06:59,506 --> 00:07:01,421 Exactly. Yes. 164 00:07:01,464 --> 00:07:03,118 I'll give you more money than you paid for them. 165 00:07:03,161 --> 00:07:04,728 No, I'm sorry. 166 00:07:04,772 --> 00:07:06,904 I feel I look my best when I'm relaxed, 167 00:07:06,948 --> 00:07:08,602 and these will relax me. 168 00:07:08,645 --> 00:07:10,168 Wait, wait, wait. I'll trade services for them. 169 00:07:10,212 --> 00:07:12,040 Uh, l-let me service you. 170 00:07:12,083 --> 00:07:13,911 I'll-I'll wash your dog or your kids or your car 171 00:07:13,955 --> 00:07:17,349 or-or you. Wh-Whatever. I just-I just need those pants. 172 00:07:17,393 --> 00:07:20,222 Dude, this is not tenna. 173 00:07:21,528 --> 00:07:24,444 Okay, nicely played, sweatpants lady. 174 00:07:24,487 --> 00:07:26,576 Seems like I may need to pay a little visit 175 00:07:26,620 --> 00:07:29,100 to the Bespectacled Dentist. 176 00:07:30,972 --> 00:07:33,496 I can't believe we got to find mom a gift. 177 00:07:33,540 --> 00:07:35,846 We areher gift, right? 178 00:07:35,890 --> 00:07:37,195 Look at us. 179 00:07:37,239 --> 00:07:38,980 Besides, I'm not seeing anything good 180 00:07:39,023 --> 00:07:40,808 in any of Aunt Maggie's cursed stuff. 181 00:07:40,851 --> 00:07:43,506 This charming stuff ain't cursed. 182 00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:47,292 "Cursed Dybbuk Box." 183 00:07:47,336 --> 00:07:48,990 Hmm. See? 184 00:07:49,033 --> 00:07:50,426 Cute box. 185 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,036 Look, a string of baby teeth. 186 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:54,212 But she didn't have any kids. 187 00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:56,258 That's sexist of you, Todd. 188 00:07:56,301 --> 00:07:58,869 A woman doesn't need to have the babies 189 00:07:58,913 --> 00:08:01,176 to wear baby teeth around her neck. 190 00:08:01,219 --> 00:08:03,221 Man, I don't know what to do. 191 00:08:03,265 --> 00:08:04,614 What are you gonna get Mom? 192 00:08:04,658 --> 00:08:06,747 When I know, I'll know, you know? 193 00:08:07,748 --> 00:08:10,751 I'm eating Mom's catfish. 194 00:08:13,623 --> 00:08:15,103 Tonya! 195 00:08:15,146 --> 00:08:17,714 We can make so much money off this thing. 196 00:08:17,758 --> 00:08:19,542 We will get moderately rich. 197 00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:21,196 And it was a steal. 198 00:08:21,239 --> 00:08:24,808 Well, I dated the previous owner, the ice cream man. 199 00:08:24,852 --> 00:08:26,244 He owed me. 200 00:08:26,288 --> 00:08:27,985 He told me he had a Popsicle, 201 00:08:28,029 --> 00:08:30,379 but it was more like a Dippin' Dot. 202 00:08:33,208 --> 00:08:35,210 Mmm! [slurping] Mmm! 203 00:08:35,253 --> 00:08:37,342 [humming a tune] 204 00:08:38,343 --> 00:08:41,390 Oh, oh, oh, oh. Mmm! Mmm, mmm, mmm. 205 00:08:41,433 --> 00:08:43,261 [grunting] 206 00:08:49,659 --> 00:08:51,008 Whew! 207 00:08:55,622 --> 00:08:57,319 Ah. Oh! 208 00:08:57,362 --> 00:08:59,364 [grunts] Brain freeze! 209 00:08:59,408 --> 00:09:02,106 Oh, I drank it all so fast, 210 00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:03,891 like Sonic the Huge Hog. 211 00:09:03,934 --> 00:09:06,197 I could drink a gallon of that. 212 00:09:06,241 --> 00:09:08,591 Oh, yeah? Prove it. 213 00:09:08,635 --> 00:09:10,375 FREDDIE: No, no, no, no, look, 214 00:09:10,419 --> 00:09:11,768 I've checked eBay. 215 00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:13,422 You guys are the manufacturer of the sweatpants, 216 00:09:13,465 --> 00:09:15,772 so just tell me what to do next, please. 217 00:09:15,816 --> 00:09:17,208 Look, man. 218 00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:19,167 We had to discontinue our entire line of clothing 219 00:09:19,210 --> 00:09:20,821 due to a huge fire at our garment factory 220 00:09:20,864 --> 00:09:22,126 in Bangladesh. 221 00:09:22,170 --> 00:09:23,519 Lots of people died. 222 00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:26,043 Oh, this is a terrible tragedy. 223 00:09:26,087 --> 00:09:28,916 A-And, you know, I'm sorry to hear about whatever it was 224 00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:30,352 that happened to you guys, too. 225 00:09:31,309 --> 00:09:34,704 Oof! Oh, where's this perfect gift, my man? 226 00:09:34,748 --> 00:09:36,880 Oh, it's coming, buddy. Uh, yeah. 227 00:09:36,924 --> 00:09:38,186 They've just become, you know, 228 00:09:38,229 --> 00:09:40,405 like, an even cooler challenge for me, so... 229 00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,798 Let's make this interesting. 230 00:09:41,842 --> 00:09:43,495 If you don't get those sweatpants 231 00:09:43,539 --> 00:09:46,107 then we don't have to come up with a gift idea for Mom 232 00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:49,023 and we all get her gift cards to Sonic with your cash. 233 00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:50,851 Oh, I'll take that deal. 234 00:09:50,894 --> 00:09:54,419 Now, which outfit says "dental patient"? 235 00:10:03,864 --> 00:10:05,430 Okay, Mister... 236 00:10:05,474 --> 00:10:06,997 Jeremy Spoken. 237 00:10:07,041 --> 00:10:09,434 Uh, let's see, wh-what's your problem? 238 00:10:09,478 --> 00:10:10,914 Eh, just a cleaning and checkup. 239 00:10:10,958 --> 00:10:14,657 Hey, look, we both like wacky, colorful frames. 240 00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:16,006 -[chuckles] -Yes, yes. Yes. 241 00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,573 O-O-Open wide, please. 242 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:20,489 But you're very professional-looking, otherwise. 243 00:10:20,532 --> 00:10:21,882 [slurps saliva] 244 00:10:21,925 --> 00:10:22,665 Not like you're wearing sweatpants or anything. 245 00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:26,277 Do you like sweatpants on people? 246 00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:28,279 Oh, I-I don't know. 247 00:10:28,323 --> 00:10:29,672 Spit, please. 248 00:10:29,716 --> 00:10:31,718 Yeah, tell me about it. 249 00:10:31,761 --> 00:10:33,850 Women look like dog shit in sweatpants. 250 00:10:33,894 --> 00:10:35,939 Don't you think sweatpants are an undesirable thing 251 00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,767 for women to wear? I mean... [chuckles] 252 00:10:37,811 --> 00:10:40,988 It does kind of rub me the wrong way, now that you mention it. 253 00:10:41,031 --> 00:10:42,598 Right! 254 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:44,818 Yeah, guys like us in cool glasses like ours-- 255 00:10:44,861 --> 00:10:48,082 we'd never want to have sex with a sweatpants lady. 256 00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:50,084 I'd be in flaccid city, wouldn't you? 257 00:10:50,127 --> 00:10:52,782 Flaccid city. Oh, yes. 258 00:10:52,826 --> 00:10:56,394 I have spent some nights there, let me tell you. 259 00:10:56,438 --> 00:10:58,919 Sadly, I have. 260 00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:01,661 Man, if my wife got sweatpants... 261 00:11:01,704 --> 00:11:04,751 [scoffs] I'd throw them in the trash. Like, tonight. 262 00:11:04,794 --> 00:11:08,189 Which is your trash night, y-yeah? 263 00:11:11,975 --> 00:11:13,934 ♪ 264 00:11:15,979 --> 00:11:19,113 DEBBIE: Come get your day-drunk on! 265 00:11:19,156 --> 00:11:22,638 Margaritas, piña coladas, frozens and straights. 266 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:23,987 Let's go! 267 00:11:24,031 --> 00:11:26,294 Hey, that truck ain't street legal. 268 00:11:26,337 --> 00:11:28,905 You need a license to sell food or drink, 269 00:11:28,949 --> 00:11:30,733 and you can't sell alcohol. 270 00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:31,821 So, what-- you don't want one? 271 00:11:31,865 --> 00:11:33,736 No, no, I... 272 00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:36,043 -I want one. -And give me a double. 273 00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:39,263 Here you go. Yep. 274 00:11:39,307 --> 00:11:41,831 Yep. Mm-hmm. Good. Yes. 275 00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:43,746 Yes, yes. Next. Next. 276 00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:45,313 Next. 277 00:11:45,356 --> 00:11:47,097 [horse whinnies] 278 00:11:48,838 --> 00:11:51,188 Ooh-ooh, uh-oh, time-out. [chuckles] 279 00:11:51,232 --> 00:11:53,234 Y'all got a license to sling drink? 280 00:11:53,277 --> 00:11:55,279 Oh, shit. The fuzz! 281 00:11:55,323 --> 00:11:57,064 Whoa! 282 00:11:57,107 --> 00:12:00,067 ooh, hot damn, horsey. 283 00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:02,591 We got ourselves a challenge in town. 284 00:12:02,634 --> 00:12:03,940 Giddyup. 285 00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,640 [grunting] 286 00:12:08,684 --> 00:12:10,381 Hyah! 287 00:12:10,425 --> 00:12:11,382 [exhales] 288 00:12:11,426 --> 00:12:14,168 Look at all this cash! 289 00:12:14,211 --> 00:12:17,084 Here's how you back onto the south side. 290 00:12:17,127 --> 00:12:21,305 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but we just outran the cops. 291 00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:23,220 Maybe I went too far with this one. 292 00:12:23,264 --> 00:12:24,787 Oh, bullshit. 293 00:12:24,831 --> 00:12:27,094 That was exactly what I Wanted to happen. 294 00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:28,704 It was fun. 295 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,532 Remember having fun? 296 00:12:30,575 --> 00:12:32,273 Since you moved out here to the north side, 297 00:12:32,316 --> 00:12:33,709 you're so serious. 298 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:36,756 You're all like, "I lost my great job. 299 00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:39,410 "My great house. My family is sad. 300 00:12:39,454 --> 00:12:41,804 Boo-hoo!" Fuck that. 301 00:12:41,848 --> 00:12:45,286 You are only once. 302 00:12:45,329 --> 00:12:47,854 Only once what? 303 00:12:47,897 --> 00:12:49,725 You. 304 00:12:53,468 --> 00:12:54,904 [trash rattling] 305 00:12:54,948 --> 00:12:57,385 Where are those sweatpants, damn it? 306 00:12:57,428 --> 00:12:59,561 Did he not follow my subtle manipulations? 307 00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:01,606 -What happened? -[crying] 308 00:13:01,650 --> 00:13:03,391 No, you listen to me! 309 00:13:03,434 --> 00:13:04,871 I want a divorce! 310 00:13:04,914 --> 00:13:07,438 Well, if that's how you feel about it... 311 00:13:11,878 --> 00:13:14,402 Oh, you better not get nacho cheese on those pants 312 00:13:14,445 --> 00:13:16,012 before Debbie has the chance to. 313 00:13:16,056 --> 00:13:17,144 Shit! 314 00:13:19,668 --> 00:13:21,104 Hey. 315 00:13:21,148 --> 00:13:22,671 Oh, ho, ho. 316 00:13:22,714 --> 00:13:25,456 Hey, let's go to "lunch" again, huh? 317 00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,110 I don't know, man. 318 00:13:27,154 --> 00:13:29,939 I mean, we drew some serious heat on that last run. 319 00:13:29,983 --> 00:13:33,508 Yes, but this time they won't be chasing us. 320 00:13:33,551 --> 00:13:35,989 [chuckles] 321 00:13:36,032 --> 00:13:37,120 [whistles] 322 00:13:37,164 --> 00:13:38,426 Nice. 323 00:13:38,469 --> 00:13:40,689 But I can't be Zorro. I'm white. 324 00:13:40,732 --> 00:13:42,604 Bitch, this one's mine. 325 00:13:42,647 --> 00:13:45,302 I got one for you, too, so we can both be vigilantes. 326 00:13:45,346 --> 00:13:48,392 ♪ 327 00:13:50,612 --> 00:13:52,135 Marg time! 328 00:13:52,179 --> 00:13:53,876 It's marg time! [chuckles] 329 00:13:56,748 --> 00:13:58,141 -[slurping] -Hey. 330 00:13:58,185 --> 00:14:00,665 You drive next so I can drink, okay? 331 00:14:00,709 --> 00:14:03,059 ♪ 332 00:14:05,148 --> 00:14:07,585 Shit, Gwen. [grunts] She's in AA, 333 00:14:07,629 --> 00:14:09,805 so she's got a short fuse. Watch it. 334 00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,373 Listen. I'm on your side. 335 00:14:12,416 --> 00:14:14,157 I hate the stupid-ass food trucks. 336 00:14:14,201 --> 00:14:16,812 Your marg truck has got the cops on their toes about permits, 337 00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:18,814 and now the trucks are all gone from my business. 338 00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,903 So keep on keeping on. 339 00:14:20,947 --> 00:14:22,862 ♪ 340 00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:27,736 [printer whirring] 341 00:14:27,779 --> 00:14:29,477 Come on, do you think people are stupid? 342 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,827 Just the people who I need to be. 343 00:14:38,355 --> 00:14:40,705 [muttering] 344 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:45,536 Dang. 345 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:47,060 I think you started this adventure 346 00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:49,976 to make money for your family or something, right? 347 00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:53,109 Yes. Yes... 348 00:14:53,153 --> 00:14:55,459 I think so. Yes, that's foggy, but true. 349 00:14:55,503 --> 00:14:57,461 Well, um... 350 00:14:57,505 --> 00:14:59,986 we've been using top-shelf shit, 351 00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:02,510 and between our drinks and cost, 352 00:15:02,553 --> 00:15:04,816 we have lost more money than we've made. 353 00:15:04,860 --> 00:15:06,122 Seems bad. 354 00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:08,168 No biggie, big piggie. 355 00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,647 I got plans. 356 00:15:11,998 --> 00:15:14,870 Why do you have a Freud costume? 357 00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:18,439 Ah, it was a phase your mother and I had for a bit there. 358 00:15:18,482 --> 00:15:19,788 Thanks for that traumatic visual, 359 00:15:19,831 --> 00:15:21,485 but this isn't gonna work, 360 00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:23,923 so we should probably go ahead and get those Sonic gift cards. 361 00:15:23,966 --> 00:15:26,447 -[rings] -Oh, really, Todd? 362 00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:30,407 Hello, Dr. Brainald Mentalson, MD, BBV, BVDs. 363 00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:33,062 Hi, I'd like to schedule for next week 364 00:15:33,106 --> 00:15:34,934 for the in-house consultation. 365 00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:36,674 A week? Huh. 366 00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:38,024 Well, let me see. 367 00:15:38,067 --> 00:15:40,200 Well, my prognostication is 368 00:15:40,243 --> 00:15:43,116 we should probably schedule a session in five minutes? 369 00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:45,640 You're probably right. 370 00:15:45,683 --> 00:15:48,556 Yes, yes, let's do it. Thank you. 371 00:15:49,296 --> 00:15:51,646 Oh, you kids better have some sweet gifts lined up, 372 00:15:51,689 --> 00:15:54,040 'cause I'm about to dunk on you with my perfect gift. 373 00:15:54,083 --> 00:15:56,129 [laughs] 374 00:15:59,088 --> 00:16:01,786 Cheap Canadian tequila? 375 00:16:01,830 --> 00:16:04,702 -Huh. -Mm... [grunts] 376 00:16:04,746 --> 00:16:05,790 You sure? 377 00:16:05,834 --> 00:16:07,227 Cocksure. 378 00:16:08,619 --> 00:16:09,577 ♪ 379 00:16:09,620 --> 00:16:11,492 Man, this sucks sober. 380 00:16:11,535 --> 00:16:13,885 Why are there drunk driving laws anyway? 381 00:16:13,929 --> 00:16:15,104 -Whoa! -[tires screech] 382 00:16:15,148 --> 00:16:16,758 Yeah, I'll have a double swirl 383 00:16:16,801 --> 00:16:18,455 with a rider of cherry liqueur. 384 00:16:18,499 --> 00:16:20,153 Again. Please. 385 00:16:20,196 --> 00:16:22,459 Five dollars. 386 00:16:22,503 --> 00:16:23,721 Here you go. 387 00:16:23,765 --> 00:16:25,462 And drunk driving laws are good. 388 00:16:25,506 --> 00:16:28,335 People drive shittier when they are drunk. 389 00:16:28,378 --> 00:16:29,945 I don't know. 390 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:31,991 Seems to paint everyone with the same brush. 391 00:16:32,034 --> 00:16:33,601 -Hold on, hold on, hold on! -[tires screech] 392 00:16:33,644 --> 00:16:35,777 Juniper! What do you want? 393 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,606 Cruelty-free margarita. Extra lime. 394 00:16:38,649 --> 00:16:40,303 Four... 395 00:16:40,347 --> 00:16:41,783 [grunts] dollars. 396 00:16:41,826 --> 00:16:42,958 Here you go. 397 00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,265 -[engine starts] -Oh, my guts. 398 00:16:45,308 --> 00:16:46,788 ♪ 399 00:16:46,831 --> 00:16:48,181 Oh, yes. 400 00:16:48,224 --> 00:16:49,660 -[stomach rumbling] -Oh, oh, oh, no! 401 00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:53,229 Oh, oh, oh! 402 00:16:53,273 --> 00:16:54,665 [muffled grunting] 403 00:16:56,885 --> 00:16:58,452 [grunts] 404 00:16:59,975 --> 00:17:01,759 [groaning] 405 00:17:01,803 --> 00:17:03,935 Ah, that burns! Ugh. 406 00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:07,852 FREDDIE: Okay, the first thing we got to do here is 407 00:17:07,896 --> 00:17:10,290 get rid of any relics of depression, right. 408 00:17:10,333 --> 00:17:13,771 The ice cream, the nachos, the photos of the husband, 409 00:17:13,815 --> 00:17:15,991 and especially those sweatpants. 410 00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:18,211 I can't let go of the past. 411 00:17:18,254 --> 00:17:21,344 The thought of a new life is too frightening. 412 00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:23,564 We've been married for so long. 413 00:17:23,607 --> 00:17:25,131 Well, you know, people are very unpredictable. 414 00:17:25,174 --> 00:17:28,003 So I say be ready to get rid of anything-- 415 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:32,268 husbands, ice cream, clothes, sweatpants. 416 00:17:32,312 --> 00:17:34,792 That makes sense. 417 00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:37,273 -Shed that past! -Yes! 418 00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:40,015 Yes, be just you. Shed the husband. 419 00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,496 -Yes! -Shed the sweatpants. 420 00:17:42,539 --> 00:17:46,108 -Yes! -Yes! They are mine! 421 00:17:46,152 --> 00:17:48,284 Yeah... What are you doing? 422 00:17:48,328 --> 00:17:50,199 Ah, I'm just so proud of you. 423 00:17:50,243 --> 00:17:51,896 Hurrah! 424 00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:54,203 Wait. I know you. 425 00:17:54,247 --> 00:17:55,987 You're the guy from the store. 426 00:17:56,031 --> 00:17:57,076 Give me my pants. 427 00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:59,121 [both grunting] 428 00:18:02,037 --> 00:18:03,517 Okay, I made a huge mistake. 429 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,954 I apologize. Please let me... 430 00:18:14,397 --> 00:18:16,312 -Hey, wait a minute. -No, no, no, look. 431 00:18:16,356 --> 00:18:18,227 Let's just keep this all tenna. 432 00:18:18,271 --> 00:18:19,881 Susan! 433 00:18:19,924 --> 00:18:23,711 Why do you have your P-A-N-T-S off with this guy? 434 00:18:23,754 --> 00:18:26,453 Are you back on the market that fast? 435 00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:27,584 He's the guy who tried to get 436 00:18:27,628 --> 00:18:29,412 my tenna pants the first day. He... 437 00:18:29,456 --> 00:18:31,153 Okay, look, real truth now. 438 00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:33,155 I'm Hitch, the romance doctor, 439 00:18:33,199 --> 00:18:35,157 a-and I'm here to fix your relationship. 440 00:18:35,201 --> 00:18:36,506 Guess what, guys? 441 00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:38,117 All this was planned. 442 00:18:39,292 --> 00:18:41,250 Listen, here's a hundred dollars. 443 00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:46,299 Aw, Mom and Dad got the best room. 444 00:18:46,342 --> 00:18:48,431 I bet Dad has some gifts he's saving to give Mom 445 00:18:48,475 --> 00:18:50,259 for, like, the next 45 years. 446 00:18:50,303 --> 00:18:52,566 We can just snake one and write our names on it. 447 00:18:52,609 --> 00:18:56,004 Dad said we should be more attuned to who she is. 448 00:18:56,047 --> 00:18:59,007 Maybe we can absorb some info about her from her things, 449 00:18:59,050 --> 00:19:00,878 from her clothes. 450 00:19:00,922 --> 00:19:01,966 Hey, what's that? 451 00:19:03,533 --> 00:19:05,187 Baby books? 452 00:19:05,231 --> 00:19:07,189 I didn't know Mom was doing this. 453 00:19:07,233 --> 00:19:09,409 ♪ 454 00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:19,680 Look! All our old art is in here, too, 455 00:19:19,723 --> 00:19:21,377 in this big tub. 456 00:19:21,421 --> 00:19:23,292 She, like, likes us. 457 00:19:28,384 --> 00:19:29,907 [laughs] 458 00:19:29,951 --> 00:19:31,300 "My whore family." 459 00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:32,432 [chuckles] 460 00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:34,782 See? You used to be more fun. 461 00:19:34,825 --> 00:19:35,957 Man... [sniffles] 462 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,785 I got to think of something fast. 463 00:19:37,828 --> 00:19:39,917 Yeah, I'll wing it in the moment. 464 00:19:39,961 --> 00:19:41,832 Please don't drop the ball here, Ollie. 465 00:19:41,876 --> 00:19:42,920 Dad was right. 466 00:19:42,964 --> 00:19:45,793 She really is a sweet woman. 467 00:19:45,836 --> 00:19:48,361 Watch me chug this shit, bitch! 468 00:19:50,145 --> 00:19:53,104 Ooh, y'all. Uh-uh. 469 00:19:53,148 --> 00:19:54,584 This is Baldwin. 470 00:19:54,628 --> 00:19:56,543 -Gonna need backup. Hot damn! -[siren wailing] 471 00:19:56,586 --> 00:19:58,240 [laughing] 472 00:19:58,284 --> 00:19:59,894 You better hold on to something. 473 00:19:59,937 --> 00:20:02,766 -[tires squeal] -[Debbie shouts] 474 00:20:02,810 --> 00:20:04,115 [horns honking] 475 00:20:04,159 --> 00:20:05,769 DEBBIE: Oh, oh, oh, man! 476 00:20:05,813 --> 00:20:07,641 Oh, that cheap tequila. 477 00:20:07,684 --> 00:20:09,643 I got to shit! Tonya, fast! 478 00:20:09,686 --> 00:20:12,515 I can't stop or we'll get arrested. 479 00:20:26,050 --> 00:20:27,356 Let's do a Thelma & Louise. 480 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,880 Huh? I hate this world. 481 00:20:29,924 --> 00:20:31,186 Let's do it, baby. 482 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:34,363 -Let's go. -Yes! No! 483 00:20:34,407 --> 00:20:36,496 Wait, no. What? What am I saying? 484 00:20:36,539 --> 00:20:38,062 No, Tonya, I got kids. 485 00:20:38,106 --> 00:20:40,413 And I love my husband and his dick. 486 00:20:40,456 --> 00:20:43,633 Oh, his dick! He loves me so good. 487 00:20:43,677 --> 00:20:47,333 Oh, I can't. No. Nope. Can't. 488 00:20:47,376 --> 00:20:49,248 Whoa! 489 00:20:54,992 --> 00:20:57,168 ♪ 490 00:20:57,343 --> 00:20:59,170 Aah...! 491 00:20:59,214 --> 00:21:01,303 [grunting] 492 00:21:01,347 --> 00:21:03,349 [tires screeching] 493 00:21:05,699 --> 00:21:07,266 Whew. Ah. 494 00:21:07,309 --> 00:21:08,876 Ha. Whew. 495 00:21:08,919 --> 00:21:10,051 Shit, I'd do it again. 496 00:21:10,094 --> 00:21:12,445 Oh. All right. 497 00:21:12,488 --> 00:21:15,926 I feel pretty great. Besides needing 498 00:21:15,970 --> 00:21:17,885 -to shit my whole body out. -[stomach rumbling] 499 00:21:17,928 --> 00:21:19,713 Wait... 500 00:21:19,756 --> 00:21:21,497 Where's the money? 501 00:21:21,541 --> 00:21:24,283 The money's in the truck. 502 00:21:24,326 --> 00:21:26,372 [groaning] 503 00:21:27,503 --> 00:21:30,158 I can't believe you're gonna let your mom down here, Ollie. 504 00:21:30,201 --> 00:21:32,769 -The night's still young. -[door opens, closes] 505 00:21:32,813 --> 00:21:35,946 -[groaning] -HARPERS: Happy birthday! 506 00:21:36,730 --> 00:21:37,948 What? It's my what? 507 00:21:37,992 --> 00:21:40,647 Oh, shit. Happy birthday. 508 00:21:40,690 --> 00:21:41,996 [chuckles] 509 00:21:42,039 --> 00:21:43,389 You're getting older. 510 00:21:43,432 --> 00:21:44,781 You're drying up, baby. 511 00:21:44,825 --> 00:21:46,696 You're gonna have a sloughed-off snakeskin 512 00:21:46,740 --> 00:21:48,176 for a cooch pretty soon. 513 00:21:48,219 --> 00:21:49,395 [laughs] 514 00:21:50,396 --> 00:21:52,659 Presents. Now. 515 00:21:52,702 --> 00:21:54,138 Hon, that's-that's great. It's all great. 516 00:21:54,182 --> 00:21:55,966 -I just... I got to... -Here you go, Mom. 517 00:21:56,010 --> 00:21:58,360 -I love you. -Aw! 518 00:21:58,404 --> 00:22:00,971 [straining]: Very sweet, babe. 519 00:22:01,015 --> 00:22:03,060 Okay, okay, okay, I got to look at it 520 00:22:03,104 --> 00:22:05,367 -a little later after I... -Now mine! 521 00:22:05,411 --> 00:22:08,152 [grunting] 522 00:22:08,196 --> 00:22:10,198 The sweatpants you wanted! 523 00:22:10,241 --> 00:22:11,373 Ta-da! 524 00:22:11,417 --> 00:22:13,244 I... wanted these? 525 00:22:13,288 --> 00:22:15,377 Yes! Yes, you damn well did. 526 00:22:15,421 --> 00:22:17,118 Come on. Don't you remember? 527 00:22:17,161 --> 00:22:19,120 L-Let... Come on, let's try them on right away. 528 00:22:19,163 --> 00:22:20,556 Come on. Let's go. Let's go. 529 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,124 [groaning, hissing] 530 00:22:23,167 --> 00:22:25,387 Babe, babe, I will. 531 00:22:25,431 --> 00:22:28,521 But seriously, look at me. Look at me. 532 00:22:28,564 --> 00:22:30,871 -[rumbling] -I need to... [groans] 533 00:22:30,914 --> 00:22:33,221 [grunting] 534 00:22:33,264 --> 00:22:35,310 [hissing, groaning] 535 00:22:39,793 --> 00:22:40,924 [stomach gurgles] 536 00:22:40,968 --> 00:22:42,404 -Oh! -Oh. 537 00:22:42,448 --> 00:22:44,363 My pants. 538 00:22:44,406 --> 00:22:46,756 Here comes exactly what you need: 539 00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:50,194 diarrhea meds crushed into a Pepto cocktail 540 00:22:50,238 --> 00:22:53,372 with a side baggy of all your catfish that I hid from Todd 541 00:22:53,415 --> 00:22:55,417 but forgot about until just right now. 542 00:22:55,461 --> 00:22:57,419 Ollie! Baby! 543 00:22:57,463 --> 00:23:00,074 You always know exactly what to get me. 544 00:23:00,117 --> 00:23:02,816 Aw. This is the perfect gift. 545 00:23:02,859 --> 00:23:05,253 Dear, oh, dear. 546 00:23:05,296 --> 00:23:07,429 What am I gonna do with you, Biggun? 547 00:23:07,473 --> 00:23:10,432 Aw, let's get you upstairs in your shower. 548 00:23:10,476 --> 00:23:13,392 I think there's still half an iced coffee in there for you. 549 00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:16,612 It's the thought that counts, babe. 550 00:23:16,656 --> 00:23:17,744 Love you. 551 00:23:20,268 --> 00:23:22,313 Just goes to show you, boys. 552 00:23:22,357 --> 00:23:25,621 Takes a woman to understand a woman. 553 00:24:08,925 --> 00:24:09,404 Chirp.